HUMANITY

I am my own worst enemy

I do things I know will be the death of me
because I derive hollow pleasures from them
I long for things I don’t have and can never have
and I am never contented with what I do have

I torment myself with self-pitying thoughts
and what-could-have-beens
despair and regret my companions at night
making Sleep an elusive creature

I have built a fortress around me to protect me from the evils of the world
but I end up becoming trapped in my own prison
from which I cannot escape whichever way I run to
since it follows me wherever I go

I am my worst critic
analyzing every word and action
and realizing too late that I can not take it back
the damage is done

I deceive myself with notions of hating others so much
but in reality the one I hate the most is myself
I am both self-centered and self-destructive
I think too much of myself but knowing that this is wrong

I compensate by punishing myself
I am too proud to leave this task to those in charge
it is I who should call the shots
my hand holding the whip

perhaps I am a victim of circumstance
but instead of blaming my misfortune
on another
I take it out on myself

there is no release
I may flee all I want
evading this harsh truth
but in the end I will only run into myself

and I will still be my worst enemy